RULES OF ENGAGEMENT

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT FOR MY SISTERS ON SOCIAL MEDIA

This must be my 3^rd article on facebook in the last month or so.the reason is simple I spend a lot of time on facebook,I belong to over 60 groups, subscribe to about 30 or so pages, advocate and belong to a number of causes and I interact with my family and friends easily through one medium. From my father down to my son practically my entire family has an account on Facebook.I will not sing fb praises, rather today I will give unsolicited advice on social media and decorum. Decorum means propriety, appropriateness, good behavior and dignity, Every decent lady is supposed to have decorum in all her interactions. Discipline is another important requirement for social interactions especially between the sexes or else Mark Zuckerbergs fortune would not be enough to settle the number of divorces fb has and will cause in the future..in our Islamic groups on fb we have fought many wanna be scholars or keyboard ulamas who insist that social media is haram forbidden ,remove your pictures women, get your husbands permission before joining and participating in social media, don’t have men on your friends list, do not interact with men even in posting etc

At first I withdrew from fb, then I returned and ignored people, removed my photograph and put my sons, made sure married was my marital status but did that stop top strange men from sending greetings? No! Maybe I’m talking from the point of view of an old married woman but I foresee dangers that apply to all women irrespective of age, marital status, religion, education level, financial power.

1.     I will start with photos do you know how easy it is for anyone on your friends list and sometimes even the public to copy or download your photos? Very easy in fact too easy.

2.     Photoshop; many people can now change and or distort photographs anyway they want.your beautiful face smiling at your daughter or cousin in a photograph can be changed to you smiling at Barack Obama in the white house with Goodluck Jonathan looking on .Even worse your innocent photograph fully clothed can be changed and your face put on that of a naked woman with very few people able to see the disparity. Many celebrities have had their faces put on the naked bodies of porn stars in x rated pictures.

TO BE CONTINUED.............

Defeminization of poverty

       DEFEMINIZATION OF POVERTY

Women are half the sky - Chinese proverb

Even if anyone disagrees with the above you must admit women are half of the world’s population if not more. Secondly history and life generally have not been kind to most women.  According to Brian Tracy the first rule to writing a book is for one to start with a message, Idea, story that you really want to share with other people. For years I have observed and absorbed people’s stories. From an early age  I learnt to listen and counsel people around me family, friends ,school mates but the greatest resource is my being a woman from a developing country who has had to face all kinds of obstacles some still insurmountable .How can I and other like minded individuals and groups uplift the lives of other women, promote their fundamental human rights ,protect their strengths and weaknesses ,preserve their dignity, change their mindset, empower them to play more active roles in improving their families, communities and nations.

I have an over abundance of ideas coursing through my mind and an even larger cache of ideas on how to improve the lives of womenfolk or at least reduce the challenges we face on a daily basis.

Rayuwa-life journal and this group are about women. Every kind of woman, Women who are also perhaps mothers, sisters, wives, friends, entrepreneurs, lovers, workers, gardeners, even grandmothers. In short-a person trying to be everything to everybody and still have a life.

   According to James Browns song, “it’s a mans world”.

      Life is hard enough, survival just is not easy but it’s doubly hard for women in     developing countries

 Women in some Developing Countries:

• traditionally own no property
• are generally illiterate
• lack basic health knowledge

Coupled with poverty, violence against women thrives in these conditions. When women are given a voice from knowledge gained in training and, with peer support:

• women's status advances and they are more involved in community decision making
• their families' diet and health improves
• they have fewer births
• they send their children to school in greater numbers

Feminization of Poverty

The “feminization of poverty” is a phenomenon that is unfortunately on the increase. Basically, women are increasingly the ones who suffer the most poverty.
‘’At the same time that women produce 75 to 90 percent of food crops in the world, they are responsible for the running of households. According to the United Nations, in no country in the world do men come anywhere close to women in the amount of time spent in housework. Furthermore, despite the efforts of feminist movements, women in the core [wealthiest, Western countries] still suffer disproportionately, leading to what sociologists refer to as the “feminization of poverty,” where two out of every three poor adults are women. The informal slogan of the Decade of Women became “Women do two-thirds of the world’s work, receive 10 percent of the world’s income and own 1 percent of the means of production.”

— Richard H. Robbins, Global Problems and the Culture of Capitalism, (Allyn and Bacon, 1999), p. 354

This then also affects children, which makes the dire situation even worse. For example, even in the richest country in the world, the USA, the poorest are women caring for children.^.

Poverty, trade and economic issues are very much related to women’s rights issues due to the impacts they can have. Tackling these issues as well also helps to tackle women’s rights issues. And, tackling gender issues helps tackle poverty-related issues.

Secretary Hillary Clinton speaking at the Peterson Institute for International Economics, said that her department will “invest” in the potential of women in developing countries to bring about economic and political change.

Women and girls are one of the world’s greatest untapped resources. Investing in the potential of women to lift and lead their societies is one of the best investments we can make. Studies  have shown that when a woman receives even just one year of schooling, her children are less likely to die in infancy or suffer from illness or hunger, and more likely to go to school themselves.

Clinton mentioned that women are more safe and less of a risk when given credit. She drew applause from the audience when she said:

Well, you know the proverb, “Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day, but teach a man to fish and he’ll eat for a lifetime”? Well, if you teach a woman to fish, she’ll feed the whole village.

21 WAYS TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE FAIL.

21 WAYS TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE FAIL

1. Have an exit route mapped before you marry.

2. Make your family and friends part of everything you do as a couple. Involve them in all decisions.

3. Marry for money, beauty, lust or status and make sure you have none of what you’re marrying

4. Be unhygienic, untidy, revolting and ill-mannered.

5. Stay out till all hours without consulting our spouse

6. Avoid mental and physical intimacy

7. Be guided in all you do by your village oracle

8. Disrespect each others parents and siblings to their faces.

9. Pick fights for no reason

10. Dole out the silent treatment for weeks at a time A.k.a keep malice.

11. Be greedy and avaricious. Be wasteful with your partners money, hide yours.

12. Aim higher than your spouses’ wealth and social bracket and always show them they are beneath your standard.

13. Nag, criticize complain every chance you get, in fact create opportunities if you don’t get any chances.

14. Flaunt your extra marital affairs.

15. Publicize your spouses’ shortcomings; wash all your dirty laundry in public. Dont fight without an audience.

16. Make sure all your friends are single; seek out all the hottest players and big babes in town to be your clique.

17. Drink smoke, swallow and inhale every available intoxicant, uppers and downers you can lay your hands on.

18. Forget God, parley with the devil. God is pro good. The devil is the master of discord and destruction join his posse.

19. Forget procreation, having babies ties you to your spouse, avoid pregnancy at all costs.

20. Watch movies packed with sorcery and killing of spouses and don’t hide your admiration for enchanting of spouses and killing them.

21. Shout; “I hate you” and “I wish you die” or “I will kill you” every chance you get.

If you try all these and you fail……….No be human being you marry! RUN!

Rayuwa-Life Online

A journal in Hausa & English which will avail everywoman a chance to have her voice heard, she can send in her life story, her thoughts and feelings on current affairs, style & fashion tips, motivational thoughts, recipes, prayers,formulas that have worked in her life,tips on managing her:home,career,business,marriage, divorce,children,self help,how to tips,how to create home businesses,business start up,management,promotion,finances,adverts.social calendar:naming ceremonies, engagements,weddings,parties,corporate events...the pulse of society,Everything and anything that touches the life of women. The literary section would feature prose from women and men that are unpublished their stories would be published and in some cases serialised,poetry,competitions organised in different sections of the journal. Do you have something to contribute lets talk.There are so many burning issues. you can contact us through this rayuwalife@ymail.com or sms 08098359992.